What are Parodies

A parody is (LOOK OUT! CHIM DEFINATION INCOMING!) an imitation of a serious product that is not supposed to be taken seriously and is usually made to provide entertainment. There are many examples and I shall not list them but two prominent examples are Weird Al and mrbrown. The 1st video below is the original song while the next is the parody made by mrbrown. Enjoy!!!

Haiku

Haiku is a form of poetry which originates from Japan(Duh) and has a fixed format. The poem can only have 3 lines. The 1st and 3rd line can have only 5 syllabus and the 2nd can have only 7 syllabus. Here's an example by me:

The artist sits, draws
The Turtle, so old, so wise
The brush dashes and...

P.S. I do realise that it is not a very good poem but this is only my 1st time composing a Haiku so please bear with my lameness :D

Different Types of Poems

Hi everyone. I learnt about some new types of poems a few weeks ago but I was too busy to post it until now(sorry). They are limricks, Haikus and one which I'm not sure what it's called. The unknown one is the one below by E.E.Cumings :
1(a

le
af
fa
ll

s)
one
l

iness

My June Holidays

Hi, everyone. I'm back and I'm bigger and better!!! :) In this post, I will be talking about what I did during my June Holidays. On the 2nd - 3rd week of the holidays, I went back to China to visit my relatives. It was really fun! I slept at my Aunt's house during my stay there. Life at the countryside is really relaxed. We woke up at 7am in the morning (no choice, the sun rose at 6) and had breakfast till 8. Then, we went to look at popular tourists spots or just go shopping. We saw two HUGE rocks balancing on each other and according to legend, the rock on top will rock when the wind blows in a certain way. After that we have lunch and then it's NAP TIME until we want to wake up . So basically it was eat, sleep and (surprisingly) NOT grow fat. Honestly, I lost 3kg in China! We also went fishing. I caught a HUGE fish! It is as long as my arm from the wrist to the elbow. It was great fun! The rod I used was the one without a reel so the pulling-up of the fish was really, really FUN! Much more than computer games. LOL!

My 1st Poem...

A Typical School Day

Once I had a really horrible teacher

He dunk our worksheets into pots full of glitter

When we received them they were sticky and shiny

And none of us could do even a tiny bitty

When we could not do them he got really angry

And went around hitting people randomly

He hit the students, he hit the staff and he hit the Principal

One day, he hit his own head and was sent to the hospital

Oh what a tragedy, oh what a tragedy

Our mean teacher had to go for surgery

We sent him chocolate, we sent him flowers (and we sent him poison too)

And I believe that when we say we want him to stay, we also speak for you!

However, our hope were dashed

Our teacher recovered in a flash

He bound into the classroom, stretched to his full height

Took a deep breath and bellowed,"Ha ha, I'm alright!"

But it was not to be

His health, soon did it flee

And according to the doctor's reading

He died of severe food poisoning!

My Favorite Poem & how the author uses figurative language

Television By Roald Dahl

The most important thing we've learned, So far as children are concerned, Is never, NEVER, NEVER let Them near your television set -- Or better still, just don't install The idiotic thing at all. In almost every house we've been, We've watched them gaping at the screen. They loll and slop and lounge about, And stare until their eyes pop out. (Last week in someone's place we saw A dozen eyeballs on the floor.) They sit and stare and stare and sit Until they're hypnotised by it, Until they're absolutely drunk With all that shocking ghastly junk. Oh yes, we know it keeps them still, They don't climb out the window sill, They never fight or kick or punch, They leave you free to cook the lunch And wash the dishes in the sink -- But did you ever stop to think, To wonder just exactly what This does to your beloved tot? IT ROTS THE SENSE IN THE HEAD! IT KILLS IMAGINATION DEAD! IT CLOGS AND CLUTTERS UP THE MIND! IT MAKES A CHILD SO DULL AND BLIND HE CAN NO LONGER UNDERSTAND A FANTASY, A FAIRYLAND! HIS BRAIN BECOMES AS SOFT AS CHEESE! HIS POWERS OF THINKING RUST AND FREEZE! HE CANNOT THINK -- HE ONLY SEES! 'All right!' you'll cry. 'All right!' you'll say, 'But if we take the set away, What shall we do to entertain Our darling children? Please explain!' We'll answer this by asking you, 'What used the darling ones to do? 'How used they keep themselves contented Before this monster was invented?' Have you forgotten? Don't you know? We'll say it very loud and slow: THEY ... USED ... TO ... READ! They'd READ and READ, AND READ and READ, and then proceed To READ some more. Great Scott! Gadzooks! One half their lives was reading books! The nursery shelves held books galore! Books cluttered up the nursery floor! And in the bedroom, by the bed, More books were waiting to be read! Such wondrous, fine, fantastic tales Of dragons, gypsies, queens, and whales And treasure isles, and distant shores Where smugglers rowed with muffled oars, And pirates wearing purple pants, And sailing ships and elephants, And cannibals crouching 'round the pot, Stirring away at something hot. (It smells so good, what can it be? Good gracious, it's Penelope.) The younger ones had Beatrix Potter With Mr. Tod, the dirty rotter, And Squirrel Nutkin, Pigling Bland, And Mrs. Tiggy-Winkle and- Just How The Camel Got His Hump, And How the Monkey Lost His Rump, And Mr. Toad, and bless my soul, There's Mr. Rate and Mr. Mole- Oh, books, what books they used to know, Those children living long ago! So please, oh please, we beg, we pray, Go throw your TV set away, And in its place you can install A lovely bookshelf on the wall. Then fill the shelves with lots of books, Ignoring all the dirty looks, The screams and yells, the bites and kicks, And children hitting you with sticks- Fear not, because we promise you That, in about a week or two Of having nothing else to do, They'll now begin to feel the need Of having something to read. And once they start -- oh boy, oh boy! You watch the slowly growing joy That fills their hearts. They'll grow so keen They'll wonder what they'd ever seen In that ridiculous machine, That nauseating, foul, unclean, Repulsive television screen! And later, each and every kid Will love you more for what you did. The five basic types of figurative words/phrases Hyperbole - An exaggerating statement, emphasizes on emotion. Personification - giving an element, object or abstract idea human traits or qualities Metaphor - Linking what seems like completely unrelated stuff together using words like is. E.g. He is a lion. Simile - Same as metaphor, except it uses like, as (adjective) as. E.g. He is as brave as a lion. Symbolism - Using a representative figure to carry additional meaning. ::Examples from the Poem:: Hyperbole : 'Last week in someone's place we saw A dozen eyeballs on the floor' Of course, eyeballs do not pop out of their own accord even if you watch television constantly. It is just an exaggeration to emphasize on how damaging watching TV is. Personification : 'But did you ever stop to think, To wonder just exactly what This does to your beloved tot?' By doing this, Roald Dahl is implying that the television has consciousness and actually knows that it is damaging the children even though the television operates using electricity and is just doing what it is programmed to do. Metaphor : 'Until they're absolutely drunk With all that shocking ghastly junk.' Naturally, the children are not really drunk. It is just Roald Dahl's way of saying that the children are as good as drunk as they are watching television programs everyday. Simile : 'HIS BRAIN BECOMES AS SOFT AS CHEESE!' Notice the AS SOFT AS, just like I mentioned above, similes are the same as metaphors, just that they use as (adjective) as or like. For example, 'HIS BRAIN BECOMES AS SOFT AS CHEESE!' will be a metaphor if it is 'His brain is a piece of cheese!' but that does not make sense. So it becomes a simile to describe to the reader what is the similar characteristics the cheese and the brain share. Symbolism : Using this poem is Roald Dahl's not so subtle way of telling us that we should tear ourselves away from technology (the TV) and READ. In this poem, the TV is representing technology. Now, for the reasons why i just LOVE this poem. For starters, it is really, really funny and it is not hard to see that the word at the end of each sentence rhymes with the word in the next sentence, unlike some poems (cough, cough). It is also quite accurate, though there is a lot of exaggerating. Many people are immersed in the world of technology around us and it is now more important than ever that we read as often as we can.

My Sec 1 Camp

Two days ago, on Wednesday, the whole sec 1 cohort went for a camp on Saint John's Island. It was really tiring but fun! The camp lasted for 3D2N. On the 1st day, we were introduced to our instructors and had a causality challenge. We had to move the "causality" to different stations where we had to complete a variety of challenges within a time limit. The 1st challenge was to do 50 push-ups. It was really tough! But it was not as tough as the 2nd nor 3rd challenge. The 2nd challenge was that the whole group(16 people) have to have only 6 feet and 5 hands on the ground. Sad to say, we gave up the challenge and moved on to the next one. The 3rd challenge was to move up a slope with our legs hooked around the waist of the person in front of us. After that, the time limit was up and we had to gather together at the basketball court. We were also introduced to some cheers like the hungry cheer which we do before each meal. We did some campfire preparation on the 1st day too.
The 2nd day was the most tiring and fun part of the camp(in my opinion). First, we did a few team-building stuff. We had to move 10 plastic cups from point A to point B and then stack them up into a pyramid. The instructors must like pyramids a lot because our next challenge was to make a human pyramid! It was tough but with the help of everyone, we managed to complete it. After that, we played Multi-Level Captain's Ball in the afternoon. There were different types of balls. The smaller the ball, the more points it was worth. The balls and their points are listed below.
Soccer ball: 10 points
Volleyball: 20 points
Tennis ball: 30 points
Plastic ball the size of a tennis ball: 40 points
Ping-pong ball sized rubber ball: 50 points
Water bomb mixed with detergent: 100 points
Later at night, we had our campfire! My group danced and sang to Boom Boom Pow(not sure I got the spelling correct). Some groups performed a skit, some shouted cheers and some danced and sang, but we all had lots and lots of fun.
We didn't do much on the 3rd day. We cleaned up the area, had breakfast and went home. Oh how comfortable my bed was compared to my sleeping bag. Home Sweet Home!

My Newspaper Article

Down with supplements!
A lot of people buy intelligence supplements for their kids, especially during exam time(e.g.Brand's Essence of Chcken). But is it really necessary? No one knows whether those supplements really work. Down with supplements, I say. We should not depend on supplements to increase our intelligence(not that they do). Instead, we should study hard for our examinations and receive good results by our own efforts, not with supplements. What if your child consumed a supplement before an exam and got good grades? They will feel that their results are not their own results and feel depressed that they might not receive as good grades without those supplements and so will want to buy more and more supplements which is a waste of time and money. What if the company stops producing those supplements? Your child will feel unprepared to sit for the examination and will not be as confident of success which will work against them. So, stop buying intelligence supplements.

Muliple Intelligence

Hello. Today I'm going to talk about the results of my Multiple Intelligence Test and what I think of it. You can take the test at http://tinyurl.com/32ge4g. There are 8 categories of intelligence but scientists say there are a lot more.
Here are my results:
Kinaesthetic (Body Smart) - 14/25
Musical (Music Smart) - 17/25
Logical (Number Smart) - 18/25
Linguistic (Word Smart) - 18/25
Intrapersonal (Myself Smart) - 20/25
Visual/Spatial (Picture Smart) - 20/25
Interpersonal (People Smart) - 21/25
Naturalistic (Nature Smart) - 21/21

The first question I know that you want to ask is "What are Multiple Intelligences?"
Well, multiple intelligence is not very easy to explain but I'll do my best. It has been claimed by some researchers that our intelligence or ability to understand the world around us is complex. Some people are better at understanding some things than others.For example, a person might be able to pick out different instruments in a piece of music but cannot play football well. Another person might play football brilliantly but cannot read and write well. Different people have different intelligences and so their understanding of the world around us will be different.

Now, I will give you a short introduction to the various intelligences.

Kinaesthetic - Body Smart
You may be body smart. You will enjoy sports and are good at swimming, athletics, gymnastics and other sports. This is sometimes called being Kinaesthetic smart.

Linguistic - Word Smart
You may be word smart. You will enjoy reading, writing and talking about things. This is sometimes called being Linguistic smart.

Logical - Number Smart
You may be number smart. You will be good at mathematics and other number activities; you are also good at solving problems. This is sometimes called being Logical smart.

Interpersonal - People Smart
You may be people smart. You will like to mix with other people and you will belong to lots of clubs. You like team games and are good at sharing. This is sometimes called being Interpersonal smart.

Intrapersonal - Myself Smart
You may be myself smart. You will know about yourself and your strengths and weaknesses. You will probably keep a diary. This is sometimes called being Intrapersonal smart.

Musical - Music Smart
You may be music smart. You will enjoy music and can recognise sounds, and timbre, or the quality of a tone. This is sometimes called being Musical smart.

Visual/Spatial - Picture Smart
You may be picture smart. You will be good at art and also good at other activities where you look at pictures like map reading, finding your way out of mazes and graphs. This is sometimes called being Visual/Spatial smart.

Naturalistic - Nature Smart
You may be nature smart. You will like the world of plants and animals and enjoy learning about them. This is sometimes called being Naturalistic smart.

I feel that it was quite a helpful test as it made me look at myself differently. I've always thought that I would be more number and word smart and less nature smart. It also reminded me that I should exercise more often :)

1st Book Review: The Andromeda Strain

Hi. Today, the book which I will do a review on is The Andromeda Strain. his book is writen by Michael Crichton. The Andromeda Strain is about a micro-organism from space which kills humans at a devastating rate. A military satellite has crashed and a retrieval team is sent. When the team closes onto the crash site, communications suddenly cease. Victims of the Andromeda strain...
A few planes were sent to where the team was last heard from. They discovered that almost everyone had died in the town near where the satellite crashed. The Wildfire team, a team of scientists that counters extraterrestrial threats, was summoned. When the Wildfire team arrived at the town, they discovered that the residents either died in their tracks or went nuts and commited bizarre suicides. Only two people survived. An old man and a young infant. And so the race is on to discover the cure for the Andromeda strain...before it kills us all.

Introduction

Hello, everybody. My name is Howard Yang and this blog will be about noteworthy things I've learnt in my English lessons and my reflections. If I come across a good book, I probably will post a book review here. I will also post some jokes too!
On my second lesson, we talked about blogs. What are blogs? Since you are reading this, you should know. But in case you don't know, watch Blogs in Plain English to find out(What rock have you been living under?!) We were required to create a blog (this one) to understand blogs better.
Anyway, want a joke? What was more useful than the 1st telephone?
Ans: The 2nd telephone!
Here's another joke. What is brown and sticky?
Ans: A stick